FLYING THE COVID SKIES:
TOP TEN PLAIN PLANE PERSPECTIVES
DURING THE PLAGUE
6.22.2029
By E. Perryman
#akintsucrooner
1. Everyone is masked and the styles are as diverse as the United States.
2. I am seeing masks with a round plastic protrusion on the side. I’m wondering if that is an extra oxygen doohickey.
3. Masks make traveling more physically challenging however they are a GREAT pungency avoider when someone less than fresh passes by.
4. It feels like the 1990s pulling up to the departure curb: you can get both feet out of the car without being accosted by angry reflective vest traffic controllers.
5. The plane seems supremely clean. The initial cabin waft was a blend of Lysol and hand sanitizer.
6. The Hudson news bodega is one of the few businesses open by the gate. They are now selling $500 coach “pocketbooks” next to the sandwiches and vitamin water. What the what.
7. Curmudgeonly Rosa and the American airline flight attendant crew shan’t be distributing nary a pretzel or pop any hungry passengers. There’s no overpriced box ala fromage for sale neither. You’re on your own.
8. The clouds seem whiter and fluffier than usual.
9. I blame quarancarbs for the tray table going down less easily over my omentum.
10. My seat mate this trip out is especially nice. My annoyed Karen demeanor melted away with her kind and unobtrusive dynamic.
akintsucrooner 